If it feels like you are behind and simply cannot get ahead or out of debt, know that the economy is designed in a way that the majority of the population is in debt. Sometime we make progress towards our obligations and sometime we fall behind which is the case for everyone, rich or poor. Nobody single-handedly designed the economy, but this debt based economy is designed for humanity to serve one another through our talents and abilities.
How to get our of debt:
The first step to getting out of debt is understanding the basics of money, understanding who your lender is and the potential outcomes of default. The economy and by extension the relationship we have with others is based on trust. If you entered into a fair agreement with a lender and are able to keep your obligations, by all means you should keep them. The relationship between lender and borrower should be a healthy one and mutually beneficial, not a competitive one. You both win and lose together.
Know when to default:
A key component to getting out of debt and putting it behind you is knowing when you will not be able to pay back a loan that was extended to you. If you know for a fact that you will not be able to pay back an obligation the first step is to have an honest conversation with your lender. If they provide no room for negotiation or are dealing with a bureaucratic process that does not allow for any negotiation, they they do not value the relationship they have with their customers. If this is the case you should begin considering the consequences of not paying back the loan.
Debt are like handcuffs on the brain. It is hard to be productive under these circumstances, so one way to get out of debt is to put it behind your mentally and decide which if any debts you will not pay back. Defaulting on a loan is a personal decision that only a borrow can make once they have analyzed all potential outcomes. Nobody can make this decision for you. If you decide you can live with the potential consequences, cutting off the relationship with your lender and defaulting as soon as possible could be your best option.
Most of us make a concerted effort to maintain our obligations and odds are if you are reading this you fall into this category. If you simply cannot foresee yourself getting out from under an obligation though you would be best served by allocating your resources to your family or other obligations.
Building Trust:
We should always be building trust in all aspects of our lives. We want to be seen as reliable partners and have great relationships based on trust. If you find yourself in a position where you have to default, your reputation (and credit score) will be negatively impacted. It is not the end of the world though and everyday and every new relationship you have an opportunity to build trust.